i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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