Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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