Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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