This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
