And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Randomize
