is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
