Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
i think i have two assholes
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
