yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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