Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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