what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
