Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
