you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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