What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
