??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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