I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
