Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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