On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
