It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Randomize
