I'm laying in your front yard are you home
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
