That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
