Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
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