All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
The best revenge is premature balding
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Randomize