just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
