physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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