My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Randomize
