IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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