Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Still dying that you shit outside
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
