Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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