so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Is it penis luge time yet?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize