She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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