Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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