I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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