even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
