theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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