So drunk its hurt
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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