If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
