Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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