May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
