I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
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