sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
