He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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