yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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