And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
