Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
