i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
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