they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
