Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
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