He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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