Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
