Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
