i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
