Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
