No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize